5 Lessons You Learn While Living With Your Significant Other

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Hi friends! It’s 7am and I’m sitting outside, coffee in one hand, typing with the other, and enjoying the cool morning breeze. I’ll be honest – I’m getting so excited for my Seattle trip at the end of this week that it woke me up today – and now I’m jittery and can barely sit still.

I was thinking about the trip, my upcoming birthday, and how it’s nearly my S.O and I’s three years together, and it really made me start thinking of lucky we both are to find each other at a young age.

Anyone in a committed relationship will know that it means sometimes you’re up at 2 in the morning singing silly songs together, driving around, carefree and in love, and other times it’s bickering over the slightest thing and spending three hours bitter in separate rooms.

It’s just how it works.

With being younger and in a long-term relationship, you begin to know each other like the back of your hand. And it’s even more apparent if you’ve lived together.

You don’t really realize until you’re sitting on the sofa at 2pm in your pajamas and you get a call from your S.O saying, “You’re probably still in your PJ’s – you should put on some clothes, grab your book, and go read outside with the dog. It’s your favorite weather outside.” (instantly insert heart-eye emojis)

But that’s not all you pick up and learn along the way.

01. You may not have your ideal lifestyle yet, but nothing beats coming home after a long day and embracing the one that you adore.

Honestly, I’m guilty of this in a lot of aspects of my life. I think about where my goals are, my ideal lifestyle, what I want, and then it creates a snowball effect of “What can I do to get there?” and suddenly it’s 3am and I’m pinterest-ing home decor, work goals, and health posts to fill the void. I feel like one way or another, we’ve all been there. But along the way, you start to learn that while you may have miles to until you reach the Ideal Lifestyle, each day you get to spend with your Significant Other is better than not. You learn to not get too focused on what you don’t have, but what you do. You know, ‘Stop and Smell the Roses’ kind of mentality. It’s important – because no one likes to feel as if they’re not good enough.

02. You literally have a best friend, pizza buddy, travel partner right beside you.

Okay, friends. When you live with your partner, not every moment is spent beside each other. That’s just the reality. Sometimes you go hours being in separate rooms doing your own things, sometimes you’re in the same room doing separate things, and sometimes you’re on the sofa having an 80’s film marathon.

But no matter what, you basically have a best friend  under the same roof at all times and that’s the best feeling ever. Nothing is better than finding something funny and running to show them, having dinner together, or blaring a good playlist and power-cleaning the house.

It’s a nice perk to the territory.

03. You’re going to grow and change – sometimes you may feel as if you’re drifting apart.

Commitment and honesty are really vital if this is happening. Sometimes you take a look and realize your own growth and changes, sometimes you grow and change together, and sometimes you don’t. No matter the circumstances, if you both are interested in keeping the relationship strong and functioning, then communication is where it’s at. No one wants to have the “I feel as if we’re growing apart” talk, but if done the right way, it can be more beneficial than not. It’s always better to be up front with your partner, be respectful to their feelings, and work through the hard times rather than isolating yourself and keeping it bottled up inside.

If you’re experiencing this growth and change, or just generally feeling as if your partner and you aren’t as close as you used to be, definitely talk to them and define the reasons why you’re feeling that way. And then take action – make plans with one another, set aside time away from media, television, your phones, friends, etc. to just spend quality time with one another. And fall back in love with them again – whether they’re new and improved, or the same as the day you two met.

04. Having your own space is essential.

Remember when I mentioned you two being in separate rooms? Let me just take a moment to say that it’s totally okay and healthy to live your own life outside of your relationship. Sometimes two people can get so caught up in their happiness within the relationship that they want to spend every waking moment together. I get it. You’re great, they’re great, love is great. But nothing is worse than when years fly by and suddenly you realize you haven’t spent quality time with yourself, you have no hobbies or interests, you put your own life and friends on the back-burner. Not cool, friend. Not cool.

05. You’ll always have someone rooting for you, at any given time.

You won’t have to face a single hardship, a good day, a bad day, a new opportunity, or a failure alone. How cool is that? You literally have someone in your court, cheering you on, and helping you navigate through it all. That’s pretty amazing. You’re pretty lucky. Go give that person a hug and thank you, okay

Okay friends, my coffee is now gone and my cat is staring at me from inside the house, probably mad that she hasn’t had breakfast yet. I wish I was joking. She’s literally been staring at me for five minutes now. I hope you guys have a great day.

Oh, yeah, before I forget: What are some lessons you’ve learned while being in a committed relationship or living with your partner? Let me know in the comment section!

And as always, thanks for reading! – Kimberly Starr 





1 Comment

  1. I agree with #4! We’ve been living together for 7 yrs and it’s so important to have our own space / time / lives. It’s FINE to not have every single second together. That’s so stifling.
    Great lessons!
    Mine would be an extension of #4. It’s fine to have your privacy from each other. It’s not about keeping secrets, but some things can and should be just your own. We’re not trying to merge our brains, geez. 😛


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